Blog#69: Transformations
Part One
Most of the time I forget about the work of Mary Shutan. It's when I'm in a bit of a mess - energy doing weird things and running out of control, some kind of emotional or spiritual crisis, or bizarre physical symptoms that I fear are going to render me dead very shortly - that I suddenly remember. 'Ah, Mary', I sigh in relief, and go running to her books for illumination.
The two books in question are 'The Spiritual Awakening Guide' and 'Working with Kundalini.' This is another thing that I too easily forget: the kundalini energy. It is over six years since this energetic force woke up within my body, and it has steadfastly refused to go away. It is my own version of normality nowadays, and I can forget that it is there, working away, pushing up against blockages, insisting on confrontation and resolution, inducing states of ecstasy - and sometimes agony - and accelerating the process of 'gnosis'.
I was in one of those messes a couple of months ago. At least my digestive system was. Nothing new about that, and Mary devotes plenty of words to the disturbing effects of kundalini on the digestive tract. But the combination of an excess of excitable nervous energy and an exceptionally frequent need to poo (too many details.....) catapulted me in the direction of 'Working with Kundalini'.
I opened the book more-or-less at random: this, I have discovered, is often the most effective way of finding what you want without really knowing what it is that you want.
A bit about her own life. Some of the most revealing of Mary's writing can be found in the autobiographical sections. She writes in such a matter-of-fact way that it took me a while to appreciate its value. But for anybody wishing to know about kundalini, it is more instructive to read personal stories rather than conceptual and self-consciously spiritual works such as abound in the corpus of Hindu texts, for example.
Think you've had it bad; Mary's had it worse. I may feel averse to certain foodstuffs and complex meals; Mary spent six months unable to eat anything more than rice and avocados. I may experience periods of dry retching accompanying a migraine attack; Mary underwent such retching for 24 hours, forcing her to check into hospital and end up with a near death experience. Such is a day in the life of the kundalinified. The frequency with which she uses the words 'trauma' and 'wounded' is sometimes off-putting. But she has a point.
I shall quote directly from her book to clarify what follows:
"...Other people typically extol more spiritual factors such as meditative or past-life spiritual efforts for why they have experienced a significant spiritual calling in their lifetime...... (However) For many years my spiritual path was led by the seeking of truth, and I discovered that whatever depths I reached, there was always deeper terrain to explore...... The laughable difficulty is that it is a never-ending loop...."
Then, in 2013, ten years after the initial arising of kundalini: "..... my path turned from centering around the word truth to the word peace. It was not as if I no longer had any interest in truth, but what I truly desired after so many years of struggle was to feel at peace." This and the following process she refers to as the second wave of kundalini.
When I first read these sections on Mary's book I found it all a bit naff, and disappointing even. I mean, truth is truth. That's what we want, isn't it? Penetrating beyond the lies and deceptions that we have been told since birth, and which our conditioning - which almost seems innate - insists on our believing and defending.
Never more than today have the world and the individual been in crying need of truth. While peace - peace? It's a maligned word, and has become maligned further in my own life. 'Give peace a chance': John Lennon in a supremely naive phase of his all-too-short time on Earth. Peace: a chimera of hope, paraded before gullible egos by manipulative politicians and various other try-to-be controllers of the matrix world. Peace, inner peace: a luxury and an indulgence that we cannot afford in these sorely troubled times. An escape from the harsh realities of an insane world.
But then, around the beginning of 2023, something started to shift in my being; a new feeling was trying to birth within my soul. I'd had enough - enough of the research, the investigating, the delving and diving into every nook and cranny of 'the conspiracy'. All in the name of 'truth'.
Instead, I began to crave, and to feel struggling to emerge - a stillness, a silence, a dark pool of deep and crystal-clear water. Peace.
Accompanying this change was resistance to writing. It was going against the grain. The mental activity needed for most forms of writing, the discursive process, the conceptual thought: all of it felt out-dated, no longer welcome. I would get irritated with the mental chatter. And, in case it is not yet abundantly clear, if you continue to go against the grain after a kundalini awakening, you get ill.
With the advent of the convid years, I was compelled into mental activity. Nothing was off-limits as I engaged in a frenzy of urgent research in the pursuit of truth. And this truth, it transpired, was not confined to the outer world happenings of visible material existence, but extended into, indeed was fashioned by, a reality outside of our five-sense world; a reality that was bigger and stranger than anything I had seriously envisaged before.
This descent down a rabbit hole plunging deeper than I could previously dare existed was necessary. I now know, and experience far more. I am more 'complete' as a result, and some of the pieces I have written over the past year especially hopefully provide intimations of all that. In a perverse way, I have to say 'thank you' to the convid episode, for providing the raison d'etre for my own expansion.
Nevertheless, the residue of excess mental activity has been difficult. It has been tricky to turn down the discursive activity of the mind. It is like an express train racing down the track, and applying the brakes is inadequate in preventing its headlong rush. What was once indispensable now needs to be discarded.
Thought, conceptual and discursive activity, churning things over, reflecting, all are limited and limiting. A time arrives when you want to jump off the bus into the dark ocean of ... peace. When discursive thought has done its job, and the time has arrived to move on. I have been standing at the juncture for a while, and now it's time to leave the crossroads.
Part Two
Now here's a thing. The Gateway Process. It was instigated by the CIA back in the 1980s; and one thing you'll know is that, wherever the CIA is involved, something 'interesting' is going on....
It is fairly well-known that some of the Nazis were fascinated, not to say obsessed, with aspects of the esoteric, the occult. They knew clearly that this was all real, and they sought to use this reality to their own benefit.
In some ways, the CIA and other (primarily American) organisations continued where the Nazis left off. In some cases, the continuation is only too clear, even down to personnel, as in the founding and development of NASA. Operation Paperclip at the end of WW11 saw prominent Nazi scientists shipped across the Atlantic, where their knowledge was put to use by authorities which had more in common with their apparent enemies than most people would dare to consider.
The Gateway Process was established in 1983 on the back of the pioneering work done by Robert Monroe. The CIA sniffed him out and got his research on board, in their pursuit of ways to influence and manipulate people without their realising, along with finding out what the enemy was up to.
Robert Monroe is probably best-known for coining the term 'loosh' for the low-frequency ('negative') energies generated by human beings (and other living things, I believe) in order to provide sustenance for entities inhabiting the lower astral realms. This followed in the wake of Monroe's out-of-the-body experiences, in which he encountered such entities and came to know of their programme of energy harvesting from the sufferings of human beings.
The Robert Monroe Institute continues to specialise in research into aspects of the paranormal such as out-of-the-body experiences (OBEs) and remote viewing (the ability to see what is happening far away). It facilitates such experiences by providing practical methods for so doing.
The CIA, of course, attracted like wasps to a honey pot, take note of anything which might assist in their tasks of spying, influencing, disturbing, and unknowingly manipulating, anyone considered as 'the enemy'. The paranormal skills practiced by the Monroe Institute are just up their street.
It is a feature of a certain level of the cabal, control system, call it what you will. They know full well of the power and reality of what we call the paranormal, the non-physical realms. At the same time, the general populace is led to believe that such phenomena are hocus-pocus, superstitious nonsense, the domain of primitive peoples. Believe in such stuff and the mainstream will largely dismiss and ridicule you. In this way, people are denied access to a large portion of reality. They live in ignorance. What better cover for secret operations than for the majority of people to deny its very possibility!
The paranormal and occult are focal pillars for the activities of the dark forces manipulating events on Earth. For centuries now, the general population has been 'educated' in a programme to discredit these elements of existence. Those opposing the trend - 'witches', for example - are banished and often brutally exterminated. As a result, a perceptual prison has been created, its walls consisting of five-sense level of reality. Those who consider themselves well-educated will especially insist that this is the one and only reality. This is genius of the highest and darkest kind.....
The age of reason; the scientific revolution: viewed from this perspective, this is all bullshit, designed to confine human perception, to isolate human awareness from nearly all that it could be. 'Following the science', as people donned masks and queued up for toxic injections, illustrates how far down this erroneous path some people have walked, and the effects of following the false god of modern mainstream science.
Of particular interest in relation to this blog piece is the Monroe Institute's notion of Hemi-Sync. This refers to the synchronisation - harmonising, we could call it - of the left and right hemispheres of the brain. In a rough-and-ready way, it can be said that the left brain deals mainly with analysis, concepts, words, and linear thought, time-and-space; while the right brain majors on synthesis, intuition, creativity, spontaneity, and seeing everything fitting together at once.
Western cultures have been built with the bricks of the left brain. Science, reason, compartmentalisation, rule the roost, while the mainstream will try to denigrate the non-rational functions of existence into superstition, pseudo-medicine and pseudo-science.
The left side of the brain, isolated from its more expanded function in co-operation with the right, is the home of the perceptual prison. If you try to understand existence purely by using the left brain - i.e. through reason, concepts, discursive thought - you will be working from the perspective of a perceptual prisoner. Thought has its uses, but that's all. Without connection to higher functions, it is pretty much useless in dealing with the bigger questions about reality.
Hemi-Sync recognises this. In order to access more expanded states which facilitate paranormal (or non-normal) experiences such as out-of-body travelling, the two hemispheres of the brain must be balanced, in harmony with one another. This is not just an optional extra, but a vital pre-requisite.
Expanding upon this a little, it becomes clear to me that, beyond a certain kindergarten point, no progress in 'spiritual life', expansion of consciousness beyond the confines of the everyday 3D prison - understanding what life is more deeply and truly about -, is possible without this synchronisation of left and right sides of the brain.
The writing I have done on this blog over the past year or so has been too lopsided, majoring on left-side functions. Writing generally will have this tendency, although forms such as fiction writing, and possibly poetry, may emanate from a more holistic version of brain function. Even conceptual writing can be more balanced, if it comes moistened with inspiration, and the real breath of creativity. But this has failed to be the case all too often in more recent times. That's not to say that there has been no value in the words that have appeared on this blog, not at all. But it has left me feeling dissatisfied, so-so, headachy, sometimes nauseous.
I was intending to close down the blog. Leave the words, the language, behind. A couple of people have commented that they don't like that idea, which I suppose is heartening. The blog will live on, for now, but my mindset will be different. I have made an effort to maintain a regular output, say once every fortnight. I'll give up on this self-imposed duty. 2024 will be the year of the right brain. Or, more like, the whole brain....! I intend.....
Links: Any search on 'Robert Monroe' or 'Gateway Process' will provide articles and videos. Here is a fairly lengthy but, it seems to me, thorough piece:
